Running
by SaffronAngel
Summary: Season 7 was a bit of a letdown in the ending. This is my alternative on the ending and how I would have continued it from there.
1. Entry 1

DISCLAIMER: Not mine. The characters you recognize are property of Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy Productions.

SUMMARY: I didn't like the ending of season 7 so this is my take on how it should have happened. This comes from a role playing game that I was in with some friends of mine. I'm talking to them to see if they want to allow me to use their stuff. This picks up with where season 7 _should have, _in my opinion, ended. Don't worry. Any characters that I kill off at the beginning will make an appearance later in some form or another.

SPOILERS: Buffy up through the final episode and Angel up through the end of season four.

**

* * *

May 21, 2003**

I can't believe I'm doing this. I swore that I'd never keep another diary as long as I lived. Not after the burning of the fake diaries. I had tried to refuse when Wesley handed me the notebook and asked me to keep track of where Spike and I went.

Today was the day that I left all of my friends behind. Willow and Kennedy stayed in LA with Angel. Faith stayed in LA too. I don't know where Robin's going when he gets out of the hospital. Xander just disappeared. We think we lost Anya in the battle. Giles was going back to England. He was going to try to rebuild the Watchers' Council, giving them a bit more modern twist. He wanted to make sure that the people running the council knew what Slayers went through.

That's right. I said Slayers. There's a whole bunch of them now. Willow, mighty mojo maker that she is, cast a spell that made every Potential in the world a Slayer. No more Potentials, just real full-fledged Slayers. We needed each and every one of them in order to hold back the tide of Bringers and Uber-vamps. Some died. Some survived. Sunnydale was sucked into a giant hole.

Anyway, just before Spike and I left LA, Wesley handed me this notebook and asked me to "chronicle any adventures had along the way, not to mention any demons that were encountered."

Spike and I left LA and stopped in Barstow. We hadn't traveled far but decided to stop because we were both just totally exhausted by the events of the past few days. I couldn't fall asleep at first. When I finally did, that's when the nightmares came.

"_Dawnie, I have to. I'm the only one who can stop this. Bringing me back caused it. My death will end it."_

"_Buffy, no! Don't leave me! Don't leave me alone again!" My tears were flowing down my face and I couldn't stop them. She was leaving me again._

_We were standing in the basement just outside the room where the seal to the Hellmouth was about to open spilling thousands of Uber-vamps into our world. Buffy was determined to blow the seal. She had gotten in touch with Riley who brought his team here. His wife, Sam had died helping us fight. Riley brought in a small nuclear bomb. Buffy planned to detonate it. She was determined that she had to die again. Something somewhere had convinced her that this whole thing was her fault. That if she had just stayed dead, this never would have happened. But her crossing the line to return had weakened the barrier and the First was able to break through. _

_Not far away, Angel and Spike stood watching. Buffy turned toward them. "Spike, take care of her. Protect her. I don't know what's going to happen after this."_

"_I swear, Buffy." Spike stepped toward my sister, his own eyes full of tears. "Till the end of the world. Even if that happens to be tonight."_

_Buffy just nodded. She smiled sadly at him. "This sounds familiar, doesn't it?"_

_He nodded no longer able to speak. The tears started flowing down Buffy's face. I had never seen my sister cry that hard. She wrapped her arms around Spike. "I love you. I'm sorry it took me so long to realize it."   
_

_She pulled back and turned to me. "Dawn, take care of him. He needs you." She walked away from us. _

_I reached out to try to stop her but Spike grabbed my arm and held me back. He wouldn't let me run in there after her. "NO! Buffy! Don't leave me again!"_

"_Bit, no. Don't let her last moments be filled with your tears. That would be worse for her than anything else. Let her know that you're proud of her. That you love her."_

_He turned to run and pulled on my arm forcing me to follow him. I ran with him, wanting nothing more than to see my older sister following us. But, I knew she would never be there again to guard my back. That was Spike's job now._

I bolted upright, screaming. It didn't register at first. I was sitting in the corner of the hotel room, curled into a tight little ball. Tears had left tracks down my face during the course of the nightmare. I didn't know what was going on. The look on Spike's face told me that it had just been a nightmare. That I had just been dreaming. The tears on his face spoke even louder. That was what told me that he knew what I had been dreaming of.

I'll be glad when we get back on the road.


	2. Entry 2

DISCLAIMER: Mine? Not hardly.

SUMMARY: Not much of one. Dawn and Spike are on the run after the destruction of Sunnydale. These are Dawn's diary entries.

SPOILERS: For the most part, up through the end of the show. And Angel up through Season 4's end. From there it's all me.

**

* * *

May 22, 2003**

We hit the road from Barstow as soon as the sun went down. Spike wanted to get as far away from anyplace that could hold memories for us as possible. I don't think we stopped until the sun started coming up. I don't think so because I didn't even really notice the passing miles. I was too busy fighting to keep myself awake. I didn't want to have that dream again.

The problem wasn't necessarily the first part of the dream. It was the rest. The part Spike doesn't know about.

_We had gone back to the remains of Sunnydale. We were all trying to find some trace of things that we had known. We had found people that we knew, dead. It was hard dealing with the mess._

_I had been sifting through the debris near what was once the high school. Spike had found a portion of the sewers that was still intact and was trying to find some of the stuff he had left at his crypt._

_Suddenly, I uncovered a hand. Nothing more of whoever it was. Just the hand. But I recognized the hand. It was Buffy's. I dug further, trying to find more of her. We had to bury something. I couldn't just leave her in this wreckage. _

_The next thing I knew, Xander was beside me and pulling me away from the debris. "NO! We have to find her! We need to give her a proper burial!"_

_I was still screaming as the sun went down and Spike came up from the sewers, his search unsuccessful. He took me from Xander and rocked me gently in my dream as I kept screaming for someone to dig her out of there. That was what I wanted right then. I was still holding her hand when the dream turned truly awful. The rest of my sister rose up out of the debris and walked toward me. _

_  
"Give me back my hand, Dawn. You're always taking things that don't belong to you. Give it back or I'm telling Mom." That was when my true screams started. My sister! Oh God! What was this? It couldn't be real! But then I felt her hand grab my arm._

Just then was when Spike finally managed to wake me up. I had been so scared to sleep all day that I just sat on my bed, doing crosswords and word finds until Spike woke up. Hell, I would have been happy to have homework to do at that point. When I noticed the time, I lay down and pretended to be waking up just as he woke up.

"You okay, Bit?"

"Fine, Spike. Just not totally awake yet." Just then, my stomach rumbled. "Can we get something to eat? I'm a little hungry."

"Of course. What would you like?"

"Maybe just a cheeseburger and small fries from McDonald's. I'm not really super hungry."

"Are you sure?" That was the first time he'd ever questioned me like that. I think he probably knew that I was actually starving. I'm sure he heard me stomach rumble.

I nodded. "I don't think I'm awake enough to handle more than that right now." My mind was screaming, "_Liar! He's worried about you and you're lying to him! How could you?"_

I had to though. I had to lie to him. I didn't want him worrying about me more than he already did.

Little did I know just how much worry I was going to cause him.


	3. Entry 3

DISCLAIMER: Nope not mine. Any characters you recognize belong to the gods at Mutant Enemy Studios and Joss Whedon.

SUMMARY: Dawn and Spike are on the run after the end of Season 7 (as I saw it happening). Buffy's dead (for now). Dawn is having problems sleeping because of nightmares. She hasn't told Spike yet. This is told as entries in Dawn's diary.

DEDICATION: Since I forgot this in the first two chapters, I'll include it here. This is dedicated to all the people who role-played with me in "The New Angel" and "California Knights" (both groups on Yahoo). Most especially, thanks to Kitka and Drew without who neither group would have even been started.

**

* * *

May 23, 2003**

Once again, I sit on a bed in a hotel room, doodling and working on puzzles to stay awake. I haven't slept in almost 2 whole days. I can't. That nightmare, it was just so real that I can't stand even thinking about having it again.

Spike's asleep. I guess he's not having as many nightmares as I have. Although he was crying in his sleep when I came back from a trip down to the hotel pool earlier. He apparently misses her too.

I still can't believe that she told him that she loved him just before she blew herself up. She had some nerve. I just can't believe that she did that to him. She turned him down and away for so long then said it just as she knew she was going to die.

That must be what's had him crying lately.

He keeps watching me when we're on the road. As if he knows that I'm not sleeping. As if he knows that half of what I eat I throw back up when I go to the bathroom right after. I hate doing that. It doesn't set well with my stomach to keep making myself throw up. I just know that if I have a full stomach, I'll fall asleep and that's something I just can't do. It's just not good for me right now.

He told me before he went to sleep that he needed to go find a butcher's shop or a blood bank to stock up before we get too much farther down the road. That's fine. That'll give me time to take my little wake up pills and let them take effect before we hit the road tonight.

I thought of these things when I remembered what Buffy had gone through when she came back at the beginning of her senior year. Snyder (may he burn in hell) had her jumping through hoops and she had no time for sleep if she was going to get everything done that he expected of her. She had started taking these little pills.

_**

* * *

Flashback**_

_Buffy was in her room, getting ready for a long night patrolling. Angel was back. No one else knew about it yet. I wouldn't have even known but for the fact that I followed her there one night. I saw her pour the pills into her hand and swallow them dry. "Buffy, what are you doing?"_

"_Nothing, Dawn. Nothing that you need to worry about."  
_

"_What are those pills you're taking?"_

"_Don't say a word to anyone about these. I have too much I need to worry about anymore. What with Snyder breathing down my neck, just waiting for an excuse to expel me again, my Slayer duties, the new Slayer in town and every one of my friends ignoring me right now. I just need a little help in staying awake long enough to finish the little things that Snyder expects of me."_

"_Buffy, those things could kill you. How many are you taking at a time?"_

"_Too many," came Angel's voice from the window. "Buffy, I thought I asked you not to take those things."_

"_You did. I don't take them all the time. Just when I don't have time to sleep. I'll catch up on my sleep this weekend. I promise."_

_"Dawn, this weekend, would you tell your mother that Buffy's spending the weekend at Willow's house? She'll actually be with me, if you need to get a hold of her. Just make sure that the gang calls the mansion if they need her. I'll make sure that she sleeps this weekend."_

"_No gross stuff, ok?" I knew what had brought Angelus out the last time. I really didn't want a repeat of that. It made Buffy miserable. _

_**End Flashback**_

* * *

Buffy had been miserable when Angel lost his soul, but Angelus was an insufferable prick. I'm so glad that Willow was able to cast the spell to re-soul him. Angel may be a "billowy coat king-of-pain" type. But, he's definitely better than the arrogant ponce that was Angelus. 

I could easily understand why Spike hated his grandsire so very much. I hated Angelus. I can't think of anyone outside of the loony tunes, Drusilla and Darla, that actually liked him.

Anyway, the sun's going down soon. I think Spike's going to go hunting while he tries to find someplace to stock him up on blood for the trip away from what we knew in Sunnydale.

I hope he's successful. He isn't protecting me very well if he feeds off of me, is he?


	4. Entry 4

DISCLAIMER: Nope not mine. I wish but it ain't going to happen anytime within my lifetime.

SUMMARY: This piece was inspired by a pair of role-playing groups I have been a part of. It explains some of the posts I made in the beginning.

DEDICATION: This is dedicated to Kit and Drew. Without them, the groups never would have happened and this story couldn't have come to be.

**

* * *

May 25, 2003**

It's been a couple of days since I wrote anything. It's just been a long couple of days what with the traveling and arguing.

Yes. I said Spike and I have been arguing. I haven't been sleeping. He finally picked up on that fact yesterday. He asked me why I haven't been sleeping and why I haven't eaten much lately. What he doesn't understand is that everything I've eating has come back up. I hate shoving a finger down my throat every time I eat anything.

Of course he figured that out about two hours later. When I walked out of the bathroom and he stopped me, sniffing my breath. He couldn't figure out why I avoided him whenever I left the bathroom after eating.

"You've been throwing up. Why?"

"I just feel sick to my stomach. That's all."

"Why didn't you tell me? I wouldn't have forced you to eat." He sighed. "Bit, let me help you. Let me take care of you."

"Why? I'm not a baby. I can take care of myself. I know what I'm doing."

"I smell something else on you. What have you been taking?"

"Nothing. I swear."

"Don't lie to me, Nibblet. Don't ever lie to me."

I lost my temper then. "Don't accuse me of lying to you! Unless you can prove that I'm lying, don't accuse me of it!"

He was fighting to keep from losing his temper. I could tell. I just kept pushing him though. "And what about you? You don't know what I'm going through! You didn't just lose your sister! You didn't just lose her a second time!"

I hung my head. "At least you're real," I whispered, tears starting to fall from my eyes.

I turned away from him but he wouldn't let me go. "You are real. You are more real than anyone else I have ever known. Bit, don't do this. Don't turn away from me. You and I don't have anyone else. Just each other. We have to be strong for each other."

"Spike, it's hard. It's hard to sleep. I haven't been sleeping. You're right. I've been taking these." That's when I pulled out the bottle of pills that I had started taking. "I just don't want to sleep. I can't stand the nightmares. You told me that you have nightmares too. But let me tell you about mine." I told him all about the nightmare I had had the first night we had been on the road.

"Bit, I wish you had told me about this sooner. You need to sleep. Please. I'll be right here." He was all but begging me to sleep. I nodded. I just couldn't fight my fears and him at the same time. "Lay down. I'll sit right here beside you until you fall asleep."

I lay down on the bed and he tucked me in before sitting down with his back to the headboard. I snuggled up to him. I felt safe with him next to me.

I don't get it. Just a few months ago, I was threatening him with burning him alive. I still had a hard time with the fact that he tried to rape my sister. But I understood that he hadn't been in his right mind then anymore than he was when he was first discovered in the basement after he got his soul. I had gotten over being angry with him pretty quickly when I realized what he had gone through for her and the way he had stayed beside her even when I turned against her.

The night we told her to get out, he went with her. He later told me that it was to make sure that she didn't do anything stupid. But he had told everyone else that they just didn't appreciate everything Buffy had gone through. He had been right. They didn't. I didn't and I had been here the whole time. Kind of.

I mean, come one folks. I know I'm not real. I'm a mystical Key given shape and sent to the Slayer so she could protect me. But she's still my sister. She's the one who protected me when no one else wanted to. Giles was willing to kill me if the ceremony started and no one could stop it.

Spike helped Buffy. Even though it almost killed him, he helped her. Doc hurt him so badly that night. And it almost broke my heart when I saw the look on his face just before Doc threw him off the tower. The look that said, "I failed. I failed both of them. Forgive me."

There was nothing to forgive. I knew he had tried his best. How she could not have known? I knew. I think deep down she did too. And he never left me alone through that horrible summer. He was always there when I needed a shoulder to lean on. When I desperately needed to cry and no one else could see it, he was there giving me a shoulder to cry on. Even held my hair when I got sick from crying so much.

It was amazing, the way I felt when I was with Spike. He made me feel safe and protected. _Are you falling in love with him?_ I didn't know. It was possible. I mean I had crushed on him for a little while. I just lay there for a while and dozed. I never even realized it when he got up and went to his own bed.


	5. Entry 5

* * *

DISCLAIMER: Nope not mine. I wish but it ain't going to happen anytime within my lifetime. 

SUMMARY: This piece was inspired by a pair of role-playing groups I have been a part of. It explains some of the posts I made in the beginning.

DEDICATION: This is dedicated to Kit and Drew. Without them, the groups never would have happened and this story couldn't have come to be.

**

* * *

May 26, 2003**

Spike and I worked things out finally. We sat down this morning and had a long talk.

He told me about the nightmares he'd been having and I told him about mine. It was a talk full of tears and pain but we worked things out.

He admitted that he had known for a long time that he no longer had feelings for Buffy.

"I knew the minute my soul was restored. That was when I knew that Buffy wasn't the one I was in love with. I lusted after her but it wasn't love."

"What about….?" I still had a hard time thinking about the fact that he nearly raped my sister. It wasn't a fun thought.

"That was the chip misfiring in my head. It was causing so many problems that I didn't know what was going on. My head felt like it was going to explode so often that the day she had them take the chip out, I wanted to cry with relief."

"If you're not in love with Buffy, then who?"

"I'm not sure. I've had a lot of mixed emotions lately. I have had since my soul was restored." He looked away. I wasn't sure of what to make of that.

He looked as if he wanted to cry again. I wrapped my arms around him and we both just started crying again. I don't think either one of us noticed when we fell asleep in each other's arms just holding each other.

**

* * *

May 27, 2003**

We were in the restaurant next to the hotel that night when he left me there for a bit to see if he could find fresh blood. He had squeezed my hand before he left. "Don't leave until I come back for you."

The waitress had noticed. She walked over to me after he left. "Honey, are you alright?"

"What makes you ask that?" I was startled by the fact that she had walked up to me like that.

"He just doesn't seem to be a very nice guy. Are you with him by your choice?"

"Actually, he's my bodyguard. He's been assigned to bring me home for the summer from a private high school."

"Really? He doesn't seem like the bodyguard type."

"That makes it perfect, doesn't it? No one suspects him. They all think he's a pushover until he has to fight."

_Lady, you don't know half of what he's capable of. He could rip your throat out just for the fun of it and never think twice._

"You just looked a little scared." _You would be too if you had just watched your sister blow up and your hometown sink into a giant hole in the ground._

"Well, I broke up with a boyfriend not long before summer break and he didn't take it well. He's been following us since we left California. That's why we're traveling by night. It's easier to hide in a hotel during the day and travel at night when it's harder to tell what vehicle we're in." _When did I learn to lie so easily? Is this what happens when you live like I have for so long?_ "Every few days we change vehicles. Just to try to avoid him. He just won't leave me alone and it makes things more than just a little scary at times. I hate to be left alone for any length of time because I'm afraid my ex might find me and then who knows what would happen."

"Well, I'll tell you what. I'll help keep an eye out. If you see your ex out there, or see him come in here, let me know and I'll help you hide from him until the bodyguard gets back. Ok?"

I smiled as if she had just taken a weight off my shoulders. "Thanks. I'm sorry I just get so nervous around people. I never know if my ex hired someone to try to bring me back or what."

She nodded smiling, and walked away. _What a stupid git! She bought it hook line and sinker! _

I was amazed. Even Buffy had never fallen for my crap. Of course, that thought brought back memories of times when she had tried so hard to take care of me and I had just blown it off in favor of running around with my friends.

When Spike got back, he tapped my shoulder. "You ok, pet?"

"I will be, Spike. Now that you're back." He walked me back to the hotel room where we watched a few movies until dawn started breaking over the horizon and then we went to sleep for the day.


	6. Chapter 6

DISCLAIMER: Nope not mine. I wish but it ain't going to happen anytime within my lifetime.

SUMMARY: This piece was inspired by a pair of role-playing groups I have been a part of. It explains some of the posts I made in the beginning.

DEDICATION: This is dedicated to Kit and Drew. Without them, the groups never would have happened and this story couldn't have come to be.

**May 28, 2003**

Spike and I have reached Salina, KS. It doesn't seem all that much different from Sunnydale in some ways. There's only one club that kids my age can go to. It's not even a good club. Some of the older folks call it Romper Room, but the actual name is Rumors.

Spike and I showed up out there about eleven tonight and the place was packed with cops driving through the parking lot every so often.

While we were inside, Spike thought about settling down here. It seemed to be an overall quiet town. Not a lot of demon-like activity.

"What do you think of this place, bit?" he asked me, leaning in so that I could hear him over the music.

"It's quiet. Kind of. A little like Sunnydale used to be. The most trouble that ever happened there, that anyone knew of before Buffy, was the occasional runaway."

"Yeah. The folks back there were a bit on the naïve side until big sis came along and woke them up to what was truly going on."

"I just don't know if we should stay or not. A few days should decide it." I was ready to stop for a while and the longer the better in my eyes. I just wanted to set up some new roots. You know what I mean. Put Sunnydale and those I lost behind me.

I think we'll stay in the hotel where we are for now. We need to find out if this would be a place we can stay or not.

**June 5, 2003**

We're running again. Demons found us in Salina last night. I can't believe it. We were so careful. We didn't do anything to draw attention to ourselves but they found us.

I fell asleep crying when we got back to the hotel only to throw everything into the car and take off. I cried for a good 100 to 150 miles before I fell asleep with my head in Spike's lap.

As I drifted off, I heard him tell me with a catch in his voice, "You're safe, bit. I'll find a place where you'll be safe forever. I promise."

**June 6, 2003**

We made it to St Louis, MO tonight. I can't believe we're running again. I was ready to settle down in Salina. It was a nice place. Not overrun with demons and no sign of a Hellmouth.

When we arrived exactly I don't know. Spike carried me inside while I was still asleep. I woke up a while later to a nightmare about them finding us.

_We had just woken up. It was about nine at night and we knew that Spike couldn't go outside just yet. We were just waiting for the sun to finish going down._

_Suddenly, from the other side of the hotel we heard screaming. Spike stood back as I threw open the curtains to see five or six demons staring in the window. _

_I screamed. I couldn't help it. These things were even uglier than the ones that came to Sunnydale just as Buffy came back from the dead last time. _

_I just knew that this was it. I wouldn't be able to stay here. The demons had found me and I wasn't going to be the cause of this town meeting the same fate as Sunnydale. _

_Spike grabbed me and threw me out of the way as the first one came through the window. I ran into the bathroom and shut the door. It was the only way in or out of that room. I would be trapped if Spike was beaten but it was there that I felt the safest._

_It seemed like forever before silence filled the room. Suddenly, there was a knock on the bathroom door. _

_  
"Bit? Are you ok?"_

_I threw open the door and saw Spike standing there all beaten up and bloody. It reminded me of the time that he had helped me home after Buffy died the summer we lost Mom. He fell to his knees and I went to mine in front of him. I wrapped my arms around him and pulled him close. We scooted back into the bathroom and kicked the door shut._

_He put his head in my lap and relaxed for a few minutes before looking up at me. "Dawn, I'm sorry. We have to run again."_

"_I know," I whispered. I didn't want to but we had to. Apparently, we were in danger here again. _

_We both got up and packed what little we had, loaded it into the car and left before anyone even noticed we were gone._

It had been a long night. We drove fast, breaking all the speed limits. Spike acted as if he couldn't put enough road between them and us.

He looked over at me after a couple of hours of driving hard and fast to see the tears running down my face. "Bit, I'm not mad. Not at you anyway. Those demons are persistent. I just bloody well want to find a place where we don't have to run anymore."

He reached out a hand and pulled me in close. I snuggled into his shoulder and started crying again. He just held me as he pulled off the side of the road.

When we had stopped, he pulled me close and buried his face in my hair as we both cried for a little while. Until both of us were worn out between the fight and the flight.

What are we going to do now?


End file.
